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A Warm Place

by Spring Break

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A Warm Place 05:36
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about

A Warm Place
Allow me my warmth
The tender air from the shower
Feels like a moment in the womb
And bubbles line my throat
Sinking inside, diffusing into
My nervous system
It's double-pronged relaxation
Born from necessity
When the delivery man came with
The twelve pack and the bottles of wine,
Could he see me shaking?
Could he see the reds of my eyes?
Was he counting the seconds until he could leave?
I wanted him gone.
And if the convenience store were closer,
I wouldn't have bothered.
Alas, there we were.
For a moment, uncomfortable and tense.
When I finish, I'll hit the town in search of more.
And do it again tomorrow.

King For A Day, God For A Moment
I want to spend all my time in this state
In this place, with these people
How have I never connected with them like this?
How can a moment be so pure?
The white residue in my nose
And the love in my stomach
When the cigarette burns into my arm,
It feels like a kiss
Like the red ember was made for my flesh
I'm powerful and beautiful
I see the look in their eyes
The shining admiration
King for a day, god for a moment

Let It All Come Out
What do you know about need?
My bowels are liquid
My hands like a cicada's cry
My eyes like the sea at low tide
My head like a freight train
I'm a fish pulled onto the deck of a sail boat
My gills undulating in the dry sun
My bed is caked in sweat
And the bathroom feels like a million years away
I'm a microbe, learning to think,
To crawl, to walk onto
Solid ground, all on the way to the toilet, a second home.
I'm without control
And my body doesn't listen like it should.
I need my medicine
This small death is closing in
And my heart is sprinting
My mind is too slow and racing, in tandem
My blood veins explode
My eyes are leaking faucets
Becoming torrential downpours
And my stomach is starting to heave
Let it all come out
Let it be cleared later
When the pills and the booze have started to work
When this pain begins to slip away
I cannot keep doing this
I cannot keep up this death dance
But I cannot quit doing this
At least not today
I'll kick when it gets bad enough
I'll know when the times comes
But not today
I can't kick today

credits

released October 9, 2020

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